Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

Why has Biden pulled ahead in battleground states and is now projected to win the 2024 presidency?

I have complete contempt for traitorism

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

What are some tips for making your husband fall madly in love with you again after going through the worst phase of your marriage?

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

How did Kate Mulgrew feel about Jeri Ryan joining the cast of Star Trek: Voyager?

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

My cantankerous beagle is very badly behaved at the dog park and always starts barking at the other dogs. Would pepper spray be an effective method to correct his inappropriate behavior?

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

Switch 2 Tears Of The Kingdom Confirms Link Respects Women - Kotaku

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I don’t cotton to rapists

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

What is the Replika app, and how does it work?

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

I have a reading level above third grade

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

Reality TV star’s son dead at 16: ‘Life is so cruel and unfair’ - AL.com

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

Why do Indian guys love Russian girls?

I don’t buy bullshit

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

Why should we share our wife with others?

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I can read

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

The U.S. hasn’t seen a new confirmed human bird flu case in nearly 4 months — why? - Yahoo

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

Jordan Ott hiring strengthens questions on Suns’ decision-making tree - Arizona Sports

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Why do North Indians, living in Bangalore, not bother to learn Kannada?

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Is it right to visit any shrine or tomb in Islam?

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

I see through liars

Dave Chappelle and Mo Amer on Politics and Comedy, SNL Monologues - Variety

I understand how hurricane paths work

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

Carlos Alcaraz praised for showing 'insane sportsmanship' during his French Open match against Ben Shelton - The Tennis Gazette

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I actually pay taxes

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I can count

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”